Surreal...

[d_a_r_a]

I've started the process to get our divorce papers created. I feel like I'm living someone else's life right now. There is this distance I've created from myself. Like I'm watching someone else go through all of this rather than going through it myself. Part of me still can't believe this is happening. I know it's for the best all things considered, but it is still painful.

Comments

So Sorry

[(Anonymous)]

Amanda,

This is quite a shock! Our thoughts are with you during this difficult and strange time.

Chris.

Re: So Sorry

[d-a-r-a.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I'm really good at pretending everything is okay until there is just no way to pretend anymore, so I'm not surprised it's a shock. A lot of people are very shocked. Rick and I always put on a very good face in public...whether we're together or by ourselves.

[facetiae.livejournal.com]

not trying to be snide or anything; just curious really. is the plan still to stay together for six months and "give it a go?"

[d-a-r-a.livejournal.com]

Uh, no. Rick got to a point where he told me that if I want out I should just leave, so I am. There doesn't seem to be much point to dragging out the painful experience of continuing to live under the same roof. I just need to get a job before I can move out.

[facetiae.livejournal.com]

well, I gathered that plan has sorta deflated, but I didn't want to assume.

Well, that was fast...

[d-a-r-a.livejournal.com]

I got our divorce papers via e-mail attachment already. Still a few things I need to look up and enter into the forms (marriage license #, court where I'll be filing's address & phone etc.) but it's all essentially been done for me for only $95. Our society really does make divorce far too easy...not that it's easy - because emotionally it isn't.

[http://users.livejournal.com/-blackhawk-/]

I feel too like I am watching another person from outside my body. It is really wierd. It also makes this situation of being in the same house a little wierd too.

[d-a-r-a.livejournal.com]

Well as soon as I get a job I'll get out of here and some of the weirdness can subside.

On a side note - you really, really, REALLY should read the following 2 books:

What You Feel You Can Heal by John Gray
Safe People by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. Henry Townsend.

I've left them both sitting to the right of the computer - I think you'd find them enlightening.