Not pleasant

So I woke up this morning to the sound of my husband wretching in the bathroom. Not a pleasant way to wake up, but worse for him I am sure. Poor guy, stomach flu or something I guess. Every cloud has its silver lining though. When he is sick he likes to be left the hell alone so I've been happily surfing the net for a while now and he hasn't once complained that I'm paying no attention to him. BTW let me warn other introverts out there that God has a sense of humor and just maybe he will stick you with an extrovert who's love language is quality time too. But seriously, I love my husband...even like him MOST of the time and we DEFINITELY balance each other out. Occasionally he even makes me go out and >gasp< hang out with people in the real world and occasionally I make him stop doing stuff long enough to sit down and read a good book.

(no subject)

So my mom called a little while ago to let me know that my Uncle Al has lymphoma in his brain. I'm not a doctor, but that doesn't sound good. He had eye cancer a year or two ago and had surgery/treatment and has been okay up until now. He will be undergoing treatment in the Ann Arbor area.

My subconscious strikes again.

So I was just looking at the picture I chose as my icon and was contemplating why I chose it. It's Rachel Leigh Cook... no, I'm not a fan of hers (though I have nothing against her either) I just thought it was quite a Dara-esque picture. If you don't know who Dara is then you need to read the Chronicles of Amber by Roger Zelazny. Dara shows up in the second book, Guns of Avalon (which I just finished re-reading btw).

Anyway...I was just thinking how placid the picture looks. Then I got to thinking about how that's often the face I present to the public, placid, together, peaceful on the surface. I'm hiding away all the other junk and baggage under a calm exterior. So, subconsciously I think I was doing the same here on LJ. There is all this inner turmoil inside of me that I neither understand nor like to display...but it's who I am. Sometimes I fool myself into thinking I'm just mysterious, but in reality I'm just freaking scared of letting people get to know the real me. There is some charm in mystery, but it leaves you pretty lonely sometimes.